COOL

Caroline called the crinolined girls
Into the ladies room to smoke.
They sat in a circle.
"We haven't danced," one said. "SHE dances."
"She's not that pretty," said another, "her hair, argh.."
Thirteen year olds blowing smoke rings in the lav,
Deft already in the crafty ways of Southern girlhood,
"Her dress ticky-tacky."
Jimmie Green called me from the door, just in time.
"Hurry, it's Elvis..."
I fled, as I heard one say, "She's got...something,
Shes ahh...cool."
I'd have rather been one of them,
Blowing smoke rings and gossiping.

My son was thirteen and sat in his room
With his buddies in sweats,
Tough guys, lying on their backs,
Tossing basketballs as they talked,
I heard them through the cracked door,
As they mimicked their mothers.
"James' Mom's so ladeedah, Mike's Mom is gloom and doom,
Sam's schleps him to the synagogue.
But, John, your mom is cool."
I blush a bit and move out of earshot.
Cool...is that ok to be when you're
The One, the boss, the raiser of the future,
The payer of bills, the bringer of bread
And cooker of meals and homework helper?
And never remember to set the alarm?
Cool? How about "perfect, proficient , perky and polite"?

Sitting at a shady bar on Kedzie
Hearing the Houston family sing,
In a tiny room, me the only white,
"You're cool," says Whitney's brother,
The drummer straddling a bar stool beside me.
"To have found this bar, you gotta be cool,
To have found us here, you're cool."
Does that mean "weird, foundling,
Music freak", I wonder in the cold cab
Driving through empty streets
Home to my sleeping sons,
What is this "cool"?

Now, older, with a smile,
And spiked forever blonde hair,
I run around my town,
Yelling at cabbies, cooing at babies,
Flicking off falsehood.
"You're cool," says a young man
Walking past me on Clark.
"Cool?" "I just had to say it," he says.
I grin. My chin goes up a bit,
My posture bends to the strut.
"Yeah," I answer, "I'm cool."
In a gravely voice, "I'm real cool."

Like Jesus of Cool
And Miles baby and Malcolm
And Martin, and the Mona Lisa.
Yeah. Sprezatora cool,
Lodz Film School Cool,
Cool jazz cool.
I'm cool, baby,
And by now that's fine with me.